2 10 2009

Don’t you love it when a movie from childhood has a wonderful life lesson? Well, thats the way i felt today while i was watching Kung Fu Panda. Granted, this movie is not from my childhood, but I still love it and feel a little inspired everytime i watch it… and i think thats what makes any movie wonderful.

The first thing I noticed as I was watching it was how nobody thought the panda was the dragon warrior when he was initially chosen. Why… well, the word ‘fat’ came up more often than not. Uncool, and wrong at the same time. Im not sure if any of you remember, but the main reason why he wins the epic fight at the end of the film is because he DOES have a little meat on his bones. If you don’t know why then, well…. i guess you just found a reason to make a trip to blockbuster. Either way, watching it reminds me how cruel society can be. You look at the tabloids and people are either one of three things: Anorexic, Fat or a cover story. It seems as though your not supposed to be fat or skinny but the ideal bullseye. How friggin hard is it to hit a bullseye anyway, no wonder the country is either looking to lose or gain weight…. everyone is working to throw their darts at the bullseye and nobody is hitting it except whoevers on the cover of Cosmo this month. It also brings back memories of childhood when the playground kids all decided to gang up on the fat kid. I swear, sometimes i wish they could have filed in one at a time as I lie on my back in the hospital hooked up to a heart rate monitor since my body was barely able to keep it beating. Again, uncool. I assure you future children of mine, you are going to be loved no matter what you look like and if I EVER catch you making fun of someone overweight i am going to whip the belt off so quick you won’t know what hit you.

The other part of the movie that I felt awesome watching was when Poe (the panda) finds out there is no secret ingredient to Kung Fu, it is only you. This i both agreed and disagreed with simultaneouly. I know that nothing can be ‘found’ when it comes to recovery. I cannot tell you all how many websites iv’e visited, people iv’e talked with, books ive read, journal pages ive written when it comes to what to eat and when and what time. There was a point where it became something of a job. I would wake up with the goal to find the ‘cure’, newsflash… there is none. Life would be so much easier sometimes if God just had a man-ual on how o live the perfect life… but we were give that wonderful free will so that got thrown out the window a long time ago. It took me a while to realize that ‘there is no secret ingredient’ and the only one that can make/motivate me to get better is myself. That said, i do not agree at it begins and ends there. The best progress i have made in my reovery has been when i have had a focus on God. Before, when i would rely on friends and even my family they would eventually let me down and i would sink deeper into my disordered thought of: The reason they didnt ‘want’ to be around me is because i wasn’t thin/good enough. Who the hell thinks like that? Honestly… one of the best times i can remember is when i was still technically overweight. I had the energy to work out, attended church, had a great girlfriend and was even referred to as a ‘leading man’ by a couple people. At this time there was a variable that eventually gat thrown by the wayside and that was church. Falling out of touch with God led to an increased reliance on people and resulted in the self destruction that was my disorder. Now, im looking to concentrate more of God and living in Him… fulfilling His purpose for my life and i am, therefore, in a way beter place recovery-wise.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heartand lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him,and he will make your paths straight. (Pro 3:5)

So, whats the ultimate answer? There IS no secret ingredient and one must learn to lean on themselves in order to fully ‘recover’, if there is such a thing. However, there is a variable that motivates everyone differently. Some choose to get stronger for a new job, starting college, to have children, health reasons… whatever the motivation/variable is know that the result is always the same

Life. (<– worth it)

What’s your motivation?

Till next time men (and women), stay strong and know that there is more out there for you. I promise





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